It’s been said that too much

of something can be a bad thing. Even a good thing! Quite silly really. Considering that we’ve had two glorious spells of sunshine in the past two days and even hotter weather predicted for the two days this weekend, does this make me a very bad girl indeed for enjoying it so tremendously? I mean bad. Really really bad. Got off work the day before around 2pm. Walked straight past my housework. Propped open the sun lounger my neighbour gave to me. Vigorously shaked off my blue checkered picnic blanket. Delightfully laid out a spread of cold cut meats and bread and fruit and cheese to nibble on:-). Aaaaa :-). Tossed on my wide brimmed straw pink end trimmed hat. Excitedly crackled open the first page of my historical romance novel I’ve been dying to read. And last but by no means least proceeded to enthusiastically throw myself unto the sun lounger with my face but in one position: up! :-). Heehe

Could barely tear myself away from the open windows all day yesterday. I’ve entered myself into a 10,000 steps a day pedometer challenge work is hosting. Only put it on after lunch and I’d already done 4,100 before I went to bed! It’s already on this morning so I’ll let you know how much steps I’ve done later. I’ve also signed up a local charity 5k run and I intend to drop my bicycle off for repairs before washing my front fence. I’m getting it repainted and renamed.

And then I intend to meet a friend for lunch at a local hotel and maybe another friend for tea. All females I’m afraid. I’m still sadly unfortunately unrequitely stuck on and madly in love with one person.But never you mind or say aaaaa:-( hehe, I’ve made my peace with it and let it go. Felt very mischievous yesterday ( too much sunshine I tell you:-)) and tried warming up to someone who was being pointedly flirtatious with me. But I couldn’t even say hello or do small talk properly. Felt like I was going to be ill. Wretchedly so. Had to walk off mid convervation and go wash my face. Looked at every guy who walked through those hospital doors yesterday. Even the male staff themselves. And felt nothing. Absolutely not even a twinge of somnething other than the urge to be violently ill. Or queasy. Think of him. And my whole insides melt like butter. And liquid heat. Dear God help me. But it appears I’m well and truly spoken for in my heart mind and body. Hence all the exercising. Took a vow of chastity year before last so need to find someway to get rid of this excess energy before I go mad! Hehee.

Had a fab breakfast of scrambled eggs. Toast. Fruit and steaming hot coffee.Read my newspaper from front to back in perfect peace:-) aaaaa 🙂 And I’m just sitting here looking out over the fields and beyond with a massive grin on my face and tingles all over my body anticipating the day ahead. Sunshine. Sunshine. Sunshine. And then some more sunshine:-). What more could a girl possibly want?:-) don’t answer that. I’m in a good mood. A really really good mood. And I intend to be a bad girl. A very very bad girl stretched out on my sunlounger later face up to the sun thinking of nothing but past warm hugs and a handsomely rugged face:-) aaaa. Yes. Too much of a good thing. A bad thing indeed.

But I will leave you a poem. Take care and God bless from this sunny patch in England.

My head feels tight this morning

and full. My sleep was interrupted twice last night. Once by my daughter who’s got a cold and another time by my aching left shoulder.Then I was disturbed again this morning just as I was drifting back to sleep by the little angels again. They’ve all been fed dressed and watered but I’m still sitting here in my dressing gown still dazed and slightly confused. I like abit peace and quiet in the mornings especially when my head feels full but looks like I’m pushing my luck today. Where shall my peace come from today I ask my sinking spirits. I just want to crawl back into bed for two minutes and feel sorry for myself. Thats not going to happen either. So I do the best I can. I put the television on and make myself a steaming mug of coffee. My friends and her kids should be over in abit. Until then I prop myself up against the sofa and try to doze alittle with my eyes wide open. The coffee is good. Really good:-).

Happiness is

Dressing gown on, snuggled under duvet with kids watching Tinkerball after breakfast on a gorgeous Sunday morning.

Happiness is having no cares in the world even if back aches and other worries presses the mind.

Happiness is deliberately choosing to be right here. Right now. In this very given momment.

Happiness is an inner knowing that despite the contrary, everything will turn out okay in the end.

Happiness is me.

There’s a clear blue sky

outside my front room window this morning. A bird flying overhead. The top of my play swings and bits of my fruit trees. Calm. Serene. Beautiful. A little boy on my armchair going hurry up mum I’d like the tablet now and a little girl watching Frozen in her dressing gown asking for more blueberries. I glance outside my window and say to myself. Peace be still. Peace be still. Peace be still. Until my emotions settle and an inner quietness fill my soul. I smile then get up. Ready to face the day. If I’m lucky enough in one harmonious piece by the end of the day. The vicar is coming by at 10am to bless our house. And then I’ll take the kids out for a play date later. It is only 7:25am but I already feel alone. I seek love. Feel love. Need love. But it alludes me still behind my painted smiles and broken heart. So I go back to watching the open skies and blue streaks and swaying trees secure in the knowledge that as a child of the universe love will find its way to me.