Well that was an

eyefull for sure! The strip tease show! It was fully packed of course with screaming women including the seven of us from our year two class! No penises were exposed thank heavens and no one pressured me into having a drink before hand either.:-).So all in all a good night. The girls are all going dancing afterwards but I’ve come back home to my Grey’s Anatomy and hot chocolate before bed:-) Aaa:-). The show? It was okay. Flesh were exposed. Men griped and grind but it didn’t turn me on in the slightest. Maybe there is something wrong with me or the age of the men in the show. All I could think of was the way my Muse looked that day half naked in his trunks painting a farm machinery in his dad’s front garden. Now that. That just makes me want to rip the rest of his clothes off and turn up at his house at 3am with nothing but a dressing gown to show him just what kind of wild animal I could really be. Only he turns me on. Dear  lord I hope he just gives in one day to this wild chemistry between us and invite me over for steak and chips and a look around his green house:-) I’d really love to see his greenhouse:-):-):-)

My co worker invited me over for lunch today and another one dropped by in the afternoon:-). First time ever. But second anniversary of mum’s death and you know what?  I spend the day happy and I think she would have approved. I love you mum. And miss you dearly. Each and every day. Now excuse me while I go back to my hot chocolate and Grey’s Anatomy. I don’t want to miss a thing. And would you believe it’s still a big beautiful moon outside? :-)God bless you all from England:-).

What a beautiful time to be alive. Hello 2017 :-)

“You are not IN the universe, you ARE the universe, an intrinsic part of it. Ultimately you are not a person, but a focal point where the universe is becoming conscious of itself. What an amazing miracle.” Eckhart Tolle Rainbow wallpaper image from Zedge. From Be Present. Compiled by Paulette Motzko January 1st 2017 1:09 […]

via You are not IN the universe, you ARE the universe, an intrinsic part of it. Ultimately you are not a person, but a focal point where the universe is becoming conscious of itself. What an amazing Miracle. Eckhart Tolle  — Totally Inspired Mind

Hope the xmas holidays

was kind to you. Nativity  plays, secret Santas,  Christmas work lunch do and dinner, helping to wrap presents for Lapland so that every inpatient on Christmas day got a gift, visiting friends, gift buying, gift wrapping, remembering love ones…..Yes it’s been quite busy my way lately so I apologise for not writing sooner. My dad died three days before Christmas and my marriage ended around Christmas time so I can be and have been very low recently. I light a candle in the window every morning and evening to remind myself that light shall not be overcome by darkness and that even in the pitchest darkness of our lives there is always light. I light a candle to remember the dead and to remind myself that while i was still alive I had a duty to live my life fully and beautifully for those left behind. I light a candle for hope.

Hope you had a good holiday too.

To my dearest darling Muse

I still struggle to let you go. My arms long to hold you. My lips begged to kiss you. And every piece of me longs to come back home. To you. I see you as you walk by. Near enough to feel you. The heat melting my bones. But never near enough to smell the insides of your collarbone as you hold me close. As we used to. And as I long to still. I’m trying to respect your decision and wishes but I’d like you to know that at any time if you change your mind, you need only unlatch my gate, and come back home. I long to love you. To care for you. To hug you. To caresses you. To keep you. To be with you through thickness and thin. For better or worse. For the highs and the lows. To wrap you in my love and family. Laugh with you. Play with you. Pray for you. Make love to you. Cook for you. From the first momment that I saw you, all I’ve ever wanted was to bring you home.  This heart wasn’t made to hate you or bear grudges or hold a record of wrongs. This heart only wants to press up next to yours on a Sunday morning and go lub dub dub together. There is nothing to forgive. Nothing that can’t be fixed. You are worthy of family and laughter and peace. You are worthy of love. We are worthy of each other. If you still want me that is. Isn’t it time you change your mind and come back home?

I’ll be waiting. Always

Tu amor Candy.

Ps. I pray the whispers of the wind carries this to you today.